Why It’s Worth It | Ever catch yourself making excuses to skip the gym despite your best intentions? You may have tried setting ambitious fitness goals, only to watch them fade away. Here’s the twist: the secret to crushing our goals might not be about finding more willpower or the perfect workout plan – it’s about finding the right workout buddy. Through groundbreaking research, we’re discovering that pursuing goals alongside others isn’t just more fun; it’s scientifically proven to boost our success rates, even when it means dealing with the extra hassle of coordinating schedules and compromising on preferences.

In this episode of Choiceology, Katy Milkman explores this phenomenon by diving into how tandem goal pursuit can transform our ability to achieve meaningful change. From a world-champion kiteboarder’s training philosophy to a revolutionary high school graduation program launched by Dolly Parton, the evidence is clear: we’re stronger together.

Katy first talks with professional kiteboarder Max Maeder about how the power of partnership extends far beyond the gym. Mad skills aside, Max attributes a good bit of his success to his dedicated training partnership with fellow pro Martin Dolenz. Although they are competitors on race day, they motivate each other to excel during practice. Their training sessions become dynamic duels that enhance their skills. This story highlights how having the right training partner can transform routine practice into engaging challenges, leading to significant improvement over time.

Katy then talks with assistant professor (and buddy!) Rachel Gershon about a paper they worked on with a third colleague (tandem pursuit again!). They focus on a research study at UC San Diego that challenged conventional wisdom about motivation by revealing something surprising: when students were offered rewards for exercising with a friend – despite the added complexity of coordinating schedules – they hit the gym 35% more often than those incentivized to work out solo. What’s wild is that this boost in performance wasn’t just about accountability; it transformed potentially tedious activities into enjoyable social experiences.

This principle shows up in unexpected places, too. Enter Dolly Parton and her Dollywood Foundation’s innovative “Buddy Program” in Tennessee, which paired up seventh and eighth-grade students, promising them each $500 if they graduated – but only if both partners made it. The results? The dropout rate plummeted from 35% to just 6%. Let that sink in: simply linking people’s goals dramatically improves their chances for success. 

Background | Katy hosts Rachel Gershon, an assistant professor of Marketing at UC Berkeley’s Haas School of Business, alongside stories from Formula Kite World Champion Max Maeder. Key insights to level up your goal pursuit include:

• Partnership amplifies performance: When we pursue goals with others, we’re not just adding accountability – we’re transforming the experience itself. Research shows that tandem goal pursuit can increase success rates by 35% or more, even with the added complexity of coordination.
• The buddy system works best for those who need it most: Research reveals that people who initially struggled the most with their goals saw the most significant improvements when partnering up. Plus, it doesn’t hold back high achievers – everyone benefits from the social support and enhanced motivation.
• Shared rewards create stronger bonds. Programs like Dolly Parton’s “Buddy System” demonstrate that linking rewards to mutual success can dramatically improve outcomes. When our success is tied to others, we’re more likely to push through challenges and support each other’s growth.
• Competition and collaboration can coexist: Max and Martin’s story shows how even rivals can benefit from training together. The key is focusing on mutual improvement during practice while maintaining healthy competition during actual events.
• Social connections deepen through shared goals: Research participants reported feeling closer to their accountability partners by the end of their goal-pursuit period. This suggests that tandem goal pursuit not only helps us achieve our objectives but also strengthens our relationships.
• Structure matters in partnership: The most successful partnerships often involve clear goals, regular check-ins, and mutual commitment to the process. Having specific times and places to meet helps overcome the initial friction of coordination.
• Enjoyment amplifies accountability. The most effective partnerships combine social accountability with genuine enjoyment of each other’s company. This dual motivation – not wanting to disappoint a friend while looking forward to spending time together – creates a powerful foundation for sustained progress.

Source | Choiceology: The Buddy System: With Guests Max Maeder & Rachel Gershon – Season 14, Episode 1 (August 12, 2024)

About|  Katy Milkman is a behavioral scientist, Wharton professor, national bestselling author, and host of Choiceology, a Charles Schwab original podcast that melds conversations about science, research, and human quirks to help us make better decisions and avoid costly mistakes. She also produces an insightful free newsletter, Milkman Delivers (sign up on her website!). Katy believes the key to changing ourselves for good lies in better understanding the internal obstacles that hold us back.